Recently I had a great chat with one of the In Her Element FB members about busy women, burnout and learning how to stop and smell the flowers!
She mentioned that after watching a FB LIVE I did (in the group), she recognized that someone close to her is like me…mind racing, always looking to fill every minute with productivity…which she herself does not struggle with.
And she mentioned that her friend does not know how to slow down…that she literally bounces from one thing to another in search of…something?!?
Which got me thinking…
It was only 2 years ago that I realized and acknowledged that I suffer from some pretty serious anxiety…I thought everyone’s mind raced like mine, that stress blackouts/blindness were normal…It wasn’t until recently that I really started to understand that not everyone thinks like I do! Whaaaaat?!?
I mentioned to her that her friend could be going through a similar experience not knowing that her racing mind and erratic (unwanted) behaviour is not experienced by everybody…It’s very freeing to finally realize that all the comparing of ourselves to people who appear to have their shit together because they are handling stress and compulsive behavior better than us is not true…They actually might not have stress-anxiety or those thought patterns at all…That it’s true there are people who can sit and watch TV guilt free, people who carve out time to be still without having to make a conscious effort. It is freeing and a little confusing…
So what next?
What does someone with perpetual monkey brain do to find a way to shift gears towards calm and relaxation (whatever the hell that is!) First of all realize that we are not broken! Many of us experience desires and drive to succeed in many directions and when we really get going we can feel scattered and unsure. My experience with this was simplified when I decided to focus on alignment with my values and when I chose to do the work and dig deep to find my purpose.
I still want to do all kinds of amazing activities, achieve great things, engage with a variety of great people…what I don’t want is to feel burnt out from running around just getting shit done…I want the shit that I do to have a meaning, a purpose!
I suggested that her friend think about getting clear on her values as a great first step to cutting out actions and busy work that she doesn’t even realize aren’t moving her towards what she wants…they are simply moving her.
Alignment with our values, and from that our purpose, makes the decision-making process simple…Does this new venture/thought/behavior align with my values and move me towards what I want? Yes… great proceed with intention! No… great…No is a complete sentence…Next!
Do you have a clear picture of your values?
Are you consistently taking aligned action towards your purpose?
Want to know how you can?
Book a Connection Call and let’s chat about action you can take towards a calmer more relaxed you!