Have you found happiness at Walmart recently (or any similar department store)? Have you noticed what they have on display right now? You got it…storage containers, thousands of them!
Why is that?
I think it’s because Ms. Walmart knows that we like to hold on to shit! She knows that we were recently on the receiving end (and likely the giving end) of a variety of things that will undoubtedly replace our 2019 things. And because much of our 2019 stuff is still pretty good, we will inevitably decide to pack it all up in storage bins and put it in our closets, basements and crawl spaces. In hopes it will bring us happiness again.
But what really happens?
Have you noticed that when you’re down there putting 2019 away, you notice your 2018, 2017…2009 shit and you begin to think “I wonder if any of that stuff is still good?” So you inadvertently get stuck in the crawl space (or the hallway where you’ve pulled out every bin) looking through all the “good stuff” you had planned to use again.
Then what do you do?
You do a Goodwill/Value Village/Dump run OR you get overwhelmed by the experience and the emotions that rose up…some of it happiness…some not. You pull out a few precious memories and pack it all up again. (Playing Tetris with the bins to make room for 2019.)
Why does it matter if you have bins and bins of stuff in your basement? Because shit…I mean stuff (even shit that you have beautifully organized in a bin) takes up space in your home and in your mind. Whether you plan to clean it out in the spring or get to it years down the road…it all stays back there in your mind…not bringing you happiness…it’s nagging you to do something with it.
I’m not saying throw away what matters to you
Of course you’re going to hold on to your precious memories. What I’m asking is for you to think about how much stuff are you having on to that is no longer serving you? How much of your precious time, energy and money is it consuming…and honestly how much of it is actually yours? I saw what ya got down there…Are you holding onto bins for your kids for when they have kids? Is that your grandmother’s china/flowered linen/antique whatchamacallit? And was that the box of shit your brother left when he moved across the country?
Let go of what is no longer serving you
How do you decide what to hold on to in your life, physically and mentally?
- Figure out what makes you truly happy…I mean like really happy…you know the kind of happy that is not dependent on any other person’s happiness. The kind of happiness that has you firmly planted in the present, enjoying the moment you are experiencing now…not wishing for the past or making up the future.
- Invite more of what makes you happy in your life and keep your attention on enjoying, appreciating and inviting more. Focusing on what you do want will keep you from using your precious resources, time, money + energy on what is no longer serving you or holding you back.
- Decide What do you want…now
Do the work
Just like there is no magic wand to erase your storage issues. You have to do the work to figure out what you really want. Last week when I asked you if you were an asshole I suggested that getting clear on your awesomeness non-negotiables (your values) and choosing to use them as a filter for all your decision making was a great first step!
The next step is to figure out what you want!
I know this feels like a loaded question…so many variables…responsibilities, people, to-dos to consider. Yes, you’re right it won’t be a walk in the park …give it a go anyway…Let go of the bins pilling up in your life and say “Hello Happiness”!
In my beforetimes life…(pre igniting of my awesomeness) I often struggled with feeling empty and directionless. My mind and life was FULL of shit. There came a time when I could barely get through the day without blaming someone’s crap (words, behaviour, thoughts I assumed I knew) for my unhappiness. I made feeble attempts at “feeling better” and when those ultimately didn’t work, I would end up using not-so-great coping strategies to get by (which would do little more than move the empty feeling around).
I hit personal rock-bottom. Fortunately what I found there was something that had been hidden for a long time…ME. When I sloughed off all of my excuses and took a very good look at what I had become, I realized that the only person to blame for me being stuck…was me. I was the one with all the shit…and I was choosing to hold on to it!
Everything changed when I decided to take 100% responsibility for my thoughts and actions. Through consistent and persistent effort and belief in my awesomeness (which sounds simply and is not for the faint of heart), I tackle every day with one thought in my mind…
“Do more of what makes you happy & less of what doesn’t”
I believe wholeheartedly that you too can commit to taking 100% responsibility, release the shit that is no longer serving you and create a plan to do more of what makes you happy!
Along with your Awesomeness Non-Negotiable Workbook, the 5 questions in the Hello Happiness Workbook are designed to help you figure out what you want. Let your VALUES + VISION guide you on the path to Awaken, Embrace + Ignite Your Awesomeness!
Use these tools to ground yourself and keep you focused as you move through the discomfort felt during periods of learning & growth. (When you step outside of your comfort zone…you know where all the learning happens!)
Shifting from an Everything for Everybody woman to an I Am A Priority woman does not happen over night. It requires, a growth mindset, the willingness to shift your perspective, the desire to build new ways of thinking and behaving, consistent alignment with your Awesomeness Non-Negotiables (core values) and new habits to be formed.
It is a journey only you can walk and you don’t have to walk it alone! It is my mission this year to personally coach and support 100 women through this process and help to build a global community of Women On Fire!