Being a girl friend
A new perspective on being a woman was shared with me recently. A young “man” who I have been working with, who happens to have started the amazing journey of transitioning into a woman, very happily shared a story with me about what it has been like in the early days of taking hormones. While beaming an ear to ear smile, she regaled me with a humorous tale about the devastation she felt when she was given the wrong flavored milkshake at the drive-thru.
“Dionne it’s crazy I go from feeling like I am the most amazing rock-star on the planet to instantly feeling like my world is crumbling around me…it’s crazy…I feel crazy…Yesterday I was having a great day, my mom and I went to get milkshakes. When my chocolate shake turned out to be vanilla, I instantly started bawling my eyes out. My poor mom…she tried to console me in her ‘I get it…I know this is new for you…well…this is the way it is for you right now…be patient…it will get better” way 🙂 lol.
Annnnnnd the only thing that makes me feel better is chocolate…which might be why I was so mad that my shake was wrong! I quickly went and bought a bag of chocolate covered almonds bigger than my head, which I am sure will be gone by tomorrow. I never got emotional over anything really before…I once blew a tire on the highway and I didn’t freak out I just thought oh well…I’ll just get out and fix it…even though I had no idea how! I’m pretty excited and freaked out at the same time!”
(All said through a grin only true happiness can bring.)
I laughed at her amazement of what her body was capable of and I said…
“Ohhhh Honey welcome to womanhood…you might not have the parts but you definitely have PMS!”
I feel unbelievably privileged that she felt comfortable enough to share her story with me and regardless of our relationship, (which has consisted of only a few interactions), her age and current gender, I sense already that we are girlfriends. I said to her “What an amazing opportunity to actually be able to say you have lived both sides of the coin.” We laughed at my comment and she said…
“I guess I’m lucky”.
What a beautiful person and a beautiful soul. I am so happy that she has the opportunity to be the person she has always dreamed she could be!
I wish that for all of my friends.
My brief time with my young girl friend got me thinking about all of the other amazing girl-friends I have in my life. The beautiful souls who I have the honor of sharing this life with. The crazy ass women who I can talk to when I feel bent and in shock of what my body is capable of. Who don’t try to fix my problems … their loving presence simply says…”well…this is the way it is for you right now…be patient…it will get better”.
I need you, my tribe of strong and soft, proud and humble, laughing, crying, positive energy! I need you everyday. I seek you out to hold my hand and my heart when I can’t bear to…you show up every time. I seek you out when I “nail the landing and win the gold”…you are there, cheering the loudest.
It’s true I take what we have for granted. I never doubt where you’ll be when I am in need. I know where your heart is no matter where your body may be. And I take you, you, the whole whacky awesome mess that you are. I take you happily in my arms, in my heart, to hold forever as my friend, as your friend.
Friends for a reason, a season…
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
…now this may all be true and we could be friends for a reason, a season or a lifetime…
I believe we are the friends who are all of those things …plus some other awesome shit that people don’t put in poems because not everyone can be as fucking awesome as us!
You are my friend, whether I have known you since only yesterday, or since we were 14, you know who you are and I love you!
All good things are rooted in love, laughter and learning!